You can’t imagine it, the singer says. At that moment gearing up for her new album launch in nearly a decade, blissfully happy with her newish partner, and finally the parent to a young child after struggling to conceive for ten years, feeling invincible. Then in spring she was found to have a breast cancer diagnosis.
The musician, birth name J. Cornish, is renowned for telling it as it is. The record, her latest release, was intended as an open book, tackling every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last made an album (a gynecological condition, miscarriage, unsuccessful partnerships, emotional abuse, suicide) with characteristic openness. The first single, No Secrets, was launched in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. The illness. Later second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, came out in May and she was talking to press about how she was thriving, while at the same time coping with breast cancer. Subsequently she went public, and in early July she underwent breast removal surgery.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every press talk, and they’re, like, ‘What’s happening?’ and I answer, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” she has just had to call off performances because she’s awaiting cosmetic procedures.
We meet at a photo studio in London. She is dressed in a beige fake-leather jacket, blue jeans with detailed white appliqués, beige footwear and big frames. Picture motorcycle style meets vintage look. “I feel like I’m in the 1970s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Like the film, I say, recalling the movie. “They used to call me that!” She beams. She is fast-thinking, bold and filter-free. She says she has always been interested in humor and is hoping to make her standup debut in the coming year. “I enjoy humor. On stage I basically roast the audience.”
Personal Battles and News
The artist was preparing for an slot at the ceremony when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an ultrasound, and they said, ‘It looks like nothing; your breasts are normal.’ And I insisted, ‘However, it’s there. My arm hurts and pins and needles in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they said, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the post-birthday.” It was a Friday. The physician told her if it was bad news she’d call on the Monday. By then the singer had convinced herself it was fine. The way she tells it, it was just bad timing to get cancer when she had so much on.
“It was a fortnight prior from releasing the album after a long hiatus and four years without a single. And she contacted me and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I jump on the Zoom believing it’s all going to be fine, and she goes, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she reveals, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your test results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Men have called me difficult because I’m a strong person who understands who I am
She considered the operation scary and bizarre. “I fear going under. They lead you. During crises you go on a gurney, but this time I just strolled down with a gown on and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, she adds, she’s been lucky. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the procedure. “Cancer is awful, but you know what? Luckily it was detected early. I had the mastectomy a few months back and my one side now resembles a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” She smiles again. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The subsequent surgery is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her boobs, she remarks, are now “uneven. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. That’s impolite! I thought, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. So rude! Ironically I said I’d avoid breast surgery because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be ideal. Illness changed that.”
Previous Struggles
She is no stranger to illness. She thinks her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s used to health crises. They have often coincided with peak moments, functioning as a wake-up call, or punch in the stomach, to highlight not to assume everything is fine. “Frankly, I feel life goes, ‘You having a good time? Hold on.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied high points for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”
She reminisces to her 11-year-old self, already starting her career featuring in the London theater in a musical (she was cast at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was told about the medical problem Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as dizziness and irregular beats. “I rehearsed between visits on an IV drip, and returning to the hospital at night.” She jumps ahead half a dozen years, and 17-year-old Jess has become part of the trio Soul Deep while studying at the performing arts school. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was ready to debut in 2020 I had a automobile accident and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a twelve months.”
Wow, I say, slow down, I can’t keep up. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
